Let's · Never · Go · To · Sleep

Fairy tales are good to believe in, but even better to come home too.

Tonight was insane, I love working.

Lately, I've been so tired.

my secret love affair with Andy Samberg will never end

Life is so good.

That's all.

hey. fuck off. seriously.

savanna being here has been amazing.

today is casa bonita, the denver museum of nature and science and pete's kitchen!! (plus my first day off in a weekish)

on saturday night, the people at The Shoppe gave everyone who showed up at like 1 in the morning to buy cupcakes a box of fourteen cupcakes for 5 bucks because they were closing. AMAZING.

Hung out at the Yours, Mine and Ours house and Nicole's house a lot this last week. More than usual. I HAVE REALLY BAD TASTE IN MUSIC.

fuck work, I worked almost 40 hours last week. one customer thought I was twelve. mitch asked me if he thought he was gay and I said "No, Who's can't be gay" and then laughed hysterically. He was not amused. As a point of clarification, he looks like the mayor of Whoville from Horton Hears a Who.

olympia in four days. I'm getting into town just in time for microfestttt.

I'm in love with Nate. I think I want to marry that boy. Seriously. I mean, we've even talked about it?? Fucking weird. He's asleep right now because he didn't want to wake up at ten to go with me and Savanna to meet Colin and Kelli at 'bucks. he looked like a burrito when I left. LIVING WITH HIM IS SO FUNNY.

work is exhausting.

$91 in tips tonight makes up for that?

This one dude bought flaming kamikazes for everyone at the sushi bar.

Talked with Kathy about power ranger temporary tattoos, uhm, my managers are so awesome??

I love my job.

ashleigh and I are gonna go, like, you know, hannnng.

The Yearly Meme: Go to your LJ Calendar and find the first entry for each month of 2008. Post the first line (or such) of it in your journal.

January:

Kissing Gabe underneath the fireworks at midnight on the 16th Street Mall was all I could've asked for last night, falling asleep in his arms only made the night better

February:

So, Gabe is in A Novel Form now...everything in that boy's life happens so fast.

March:

I used to know this girl
Who gave her love away
To every guy she met
And with all the games they played
She never seemed to cry
She never got upset
And one by one they came
And one by one they left

April:
My mom and I sat down yesterday and discussed the whole Justin situation last night.

May:
I'm so done with boys.

June:
Tosis told me today that the guy from Diskreet (FUCKING AWFUL METAL FROM KANSAS...they played at a jonbenet show and then spent the night at tosis/ely/schylar/josh's) asked Tosis if "that girl with the big tits sucked dick for merch."

July:
Its a really sad day when I realize that the only song I can possibly relate to right now is 7 Things by Miley Cyrus.
...Devon and I sat in my car in his driveway and talked for like an hour about everything. We didn't think Leif and Gabe were home, but it turns out they came in the back way and for some strange reason, Leif's car alarm went off while Dev & I were in the car and he came out, turned it off, and saw us. So we went inside...Gabe and I didn't say hi and we didn't say bye and when we said things to one another we didn't look at each other.

August:
Sometimes I don't even believe the insanity of the life I lead.

The last two days were filled with boys from this band in Olympia that were playing at the Black Sheep. I let them crash in my basement, then I went up to Denver to see their show, so much stuff has happened! We ended up in the boonies of Colorado Springs at this party in the middle of a motocross track. It was very bizarre

September:
It feels so good to fall asleep next to someone again, to talk about silly stuff and to giggle uncontrollably about everything.

October:
Life is good. Springs on sunday for ANF's coming back from tour party.

November:
Zack and Miri Make a Porno was probably the best movie I have seen in a long time. I thought Nate was going to die laughing. I was glad I spent Halloween with him, he's pretty much one of the like, six people left that I can trust in this city.

December:
My parents are in the Grand Cayman Islands for two weeks.

I had a math final at 9 this morning and decided that it would be a good idea, nay, a fantastic idea, to go to Colorado Springs at 10 p.m. to go to Jeremy/Kieran's "moving to Denver!" party, even though I'm seeing them tonight, seeing as they are....moving to Denver. I got back at 2 a.m., and didn't sleep the rest of the night. Got out of bed (but was already awake) at eight, went to my math test, sailed through it, and I feel really good right now

So, according to this, the only things I do are party, work, go to school once in a while, and obsess over boys...I think. In 2008, I fell in love twice, slept with four boys, smoked a shit ton of weed, made enemies out of friends and friends out of enemies, changed my hair color six times, and generally had an amazing fucking time.

....sounds right, actually.

10:44 a.m., Preston in the background, woke up fifteen minutes ago.

Take a picture of yourself right now.
Don't change your clothes, don't fix your hair...just take a picture.
Post that picture with NO editing.
Post these instructions with your picture.

I love this new apartment.

I love denver.

Well, that takes care of that whole mess.

Its amazing how much people change and how much feelings change.

He doesn't give me butterflies like he used to, which is good.

In fact, I felt absolutely no attraction to him whatsoever.

Life's lookin' up.

fuck yeahhhh birthdaysss.

33 days till I move back to the Springs.

My stomach is in knots, I know this is the right choice. Its not for anyone but myself, its not for anything but my own happiness, in order to find what I'm looking for I need to move back, I need to be back near my mountains and back in a climate my skin can tolerate. I've already shipped half of my stuff back, I'm left with only four pairs of jeans, a couple sweaters, half a dozen t-shirts, some underwear and a few pairs of socks. My DVDs have been shipped, my books, all but two of my blankets. The extra weight of having six or seven blankets on top of me used to make sleeping easier, but now I fall asleep without even thinking about it.

Mason and Jonah are throwing me a 19th birthday party, 'cause my birthday is in five days!

I'll miss all the people here, I have so many friends its insane, but its for the best for me to move away, to try something new, this was a good experiment, but it just didn't stick.

Nevertheless, one way plane tickets always feel like such a final decision.

There should be more three day field trips to Portland when you have 8 hours a day to wander around and do nothing.

...then again, that might be bad for my bank account, seeing as I hit up pioneer square like crazy, got a new bra and Marc Jacobs sunglasses.

Chantal and I talked to a lot of very, very interesting people about at risk youth, ate at voodoo doughnuts like nine hundred times, and just had a fucking blast. the hostel was so fun, just sitting around with kids from my class, bullshitting.

I'm going to go see Teeth in Seattle tomorrow night, I think. I saw Dan Deacon the other night, he was amazing.

Pictures from portland on facebook, soon.

today a boy walked around the Greenery (the evergreen cafeteria) recording the noises that the food was making with a microphone and tape recorder.

I might not always like it here, but it never ceases to be interesting.

Leaving Colorado in two days to go back to Olympia is going to be harder than I have ever imagined. The three weeks I spent here were probably the best three weeks in my recent life, which is surprising, seeing as there has been pretty much nothing to do the entire time I've been here and when there has been, I've gotten snowed in on my mountain.
Coming here made me remember how much I missed everything. My house that sits right near Pikes Peak, my brother who never shuts up and his idiotic scenester girlfriend, my parents, more than anything my cousin and my friends. I’ve gotten to cook again in an enormous kitchen; I’ve gotten to drive my car around aimlessly whenever I felt like it, usually going to Highway 24 to look down on the lights in Manitou Springs. I had forgotten how much I simply missed looking at the mountains every single day.
There was cake baking and ravioli making with Ashleigh, Brandon, and Michelle in the kitchen while Gabe got hilariously trashed with my cousin in the sunroom. The Every Time I Die DVD was watched at least five times. There was a bizarre gathering at Leif’s with girls begging Gabe to “PLEAAASE SIT ON MY FEEEET.” We watched a documentary that my cousin got me about the word fuck. Darin and I hung out and went to visit his mom (whom I love!) downtown at Sparrowhawk. Lam and I predicted what was going to happen in Stardust in the first six minutes of the movie and were right. There were trips to Village Inn at three in the morning with our favorite waiter ever, Lorenzo. There were trips to Denver and Boulder. There was drive around and go to smoke and vintage shops with Colin day. I was deemed a worthy competitor by a group of boys at both Super Smash Bros and Goldeneye. There were exactly zero trips to the doctor, which is amazing considering my track record with getting sick. I’ve sat around in Paris on the Platte with JJ, Brandon, Chad, and Gabe hipster-observing while smoking and eating some of the best bread ever.There are these new inside jokes too, from “BOONE” to “Dude, that would be like fucking a pack of menthols….mentos?”
Ashleigh and I have had a ton of ridiculous fun. It’s like no matter where I am or whom I’m with, as long as she’s there I could be happy. I’m so glad she’s my best friend, she’s always there for me, and she only deserves the best. We tried on ugly coats at Nordstroms, drove around in her gangstered out Lexus, took ridiculous pictures, and sang along to Jermaine Stewart. You know someone is your best friend when you just look at each other and burst out in hysterical laughter for fifteen minutes.
The boy and I kissed under the fireworks on 16th Street in Denver at midnight on New Years, have gone out to dinner way more than necessary, held ridiculously cute two person dance parties and have spent most of our time just sitting around listening to some of the most amazing bands I have ever heard. He’s played guitar for me as I’ve fallen asleep and we always kiss at stoplights. It’s incredible to be with someone who is just so completely passionate and motivated. Just watching him listen to music makes me smile. I love how he has favorite synth parts or favorite guitar parts or favorite drum parts in all of his favorite songs and how he’ll point them out before they play. It amazes me that I’ve spent almost every night for the last three weeks falling asleep with someone who I’m pretty sure is everything I’ve ever wanted in a person. I can’t even comprehend how being away from him is going to feel, but he might come visit me in February for my birthday, so it won’t be too long until I see him again.
I’m probably going to have a really hard time getting adjusted to being in Olympia again – its not home, as much as I’ve tried to make it be that way